Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Boobs speak an international language.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Randomize
