Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Randomize
