I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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