Rock
Scissors
Fuck
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
