if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize