what day is it and did you see me today?
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize
