it was like eating out sand paper
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize