This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize
