Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize
