i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
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I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
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I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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