Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
