Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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