If that was your dad, he is hot
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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