it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize
