He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
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