think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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