Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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