when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
