I seem to have left my pride at pride
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
