haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize