who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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