What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I have already put on my inside pants.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
