worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
