Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
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The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
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I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
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