dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away