what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
