maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
