Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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