put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
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