I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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