I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
