Taylor Swift is so right about you.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
soo... how was my night?
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize