I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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