omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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