watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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