Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
