i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
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