VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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