so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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