Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
