what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize