bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
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