I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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