but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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