i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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