can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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