My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Randomize
