you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
