Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
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