I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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