Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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